Corporal Carrot has been promoted! Hes now in charge of the new recruits guarding Ankh-Morpork, Discworlds greatest city, from Barbarian Tribes, Miscellaneous Marauders, unlicensed Thieves, and such. Its a big job, particularly for an adopted dwarf. But an even bigger job awaits. An ancient document has just revealed that Ankh-Morpork, ruled for decades by Disorganized crime, has a secret sovereign! And his name is Carrot . . .And so begins the most awesome epic encounter of all time, or at least all afternoon, in which the fate of a city--indeed of the universe itself!--depends on a young mans courage, an ancient swords magic, and a three-legged poodles bladder.